Posted by
rycK on Sunday, March 02, 2008 1:47:12 PM
The Old Red Lady from the Old Gray Lady Instructs us in Slogans, Obscure Literary References and Clichés.
We read:
“Channeling her inner Cheney, Hillary Clinton dropped a fear bomb, as Michelle Obama might call it, implying in a new ad that if her opponent is elected, your angelic, innocent, sleeping children[like Snow-White? ed]could die in a terrorist attack.”[1]
The last time Hillary channeled with the underworld was with the sainted wife of FDR at her gravesite. That recitation was not popularly received with many except those who rely on mysticism and the Dark Arts for sustenance and survival or by those who survive on tax revenues. How many more clichés and hackneyed phrases do we have to suffer through before the central tendency of this wreckage is revealed?
“Only she has the wise head to go nuclear, should that Strangelovian[2] phone call from a power-mad Putin come into the White House at 3 a.m. Her ad shows how composed she would be at the dread moment when she picks up the phone. Her nuke look is feminine, in a tailored camel-colored jacket and gold necklace, yet serious, in Tina Fey black reading glasses.”[3]
Oh, yes. This reminds us of Weird Walter Mondale’s ‘push the button (and blow the earth to Hell) speech’ during one of his failed attempts to mimic Hubert H. Humphrey and win the White House. One might argue that there really is no red button experience other than that of Harry Truman, the only one to push one twice so the Democrats do not want to dredge up visions of the errant little poker player and mix it in with feminism and Islamo-Fascists who will soon have their fingers (or other parts) on similar buttons. If we are cremated and our histories buried beneath a smooth slab of molten glass it will not come from the Russians, who have found out how to get money for the first time in 1800 years. They are busy enjoying the fruits of capitalism.
What about a call from Osama bin Laden saying goodbye to the infidels?
“Hello Infidel Hillary! Goodbye Infidel Hillary!”[4]
“It’s hard to discern the message of the ad.”[5]
No, is not. The message is briskly decoded in the next passage and we are forced to wait.
“Tangled in her own victimhood, she snipped to Cynthia McFadden that Obama had written in his book that “he’s a blank screen and people of widely different views project what they want to believe onto him.” She said voters were projecting their hopes onto that blank screen even though “he just hasn’t been around long enough.””[6] [Emphasis is mine in all quotes.]
We will wander along bubbling brooks[7] and yonder glen for a while until we get back to the ‘experience’ cliché. As an aside, wasn’t there a mirror at Hogwarts [8]that worked something like that? We are being barraged with some 21 gun salute to the Goddess of Experience it seems. But, she has plenty of experience!
“On a conference call Friday with Hillary’s ever-more-hysterical male strategists, Slate’s John Dickerson asked exactly when she had been tested in a foreign policy crisis. After a silence long enough to knit a sweater in, as the Web site The Hotline put it, Mark Penn cited “her work on the Armed Services Committee.”[9]
There it is! Testing this notion using retrograde analysis could we just assume that any bozo who had served on the Senate [?]Armed Services Committee would be gifted with the theory, elegance and intricacies of pushing little red buttons? Now, that resume crumb is just as impressive as the answers to the following question to O’Bama: what have you done in terms of accomplishments in legislative matters??
“Duh?” “I am for change”
[Perusing an historical list of members in both halves of Congress is not interesting, rewarding or revealing. Weren’t Patsy Schroeder and Ron Dellums both on such a committee?]
If Hillary was in the thick of the post Cold War snarls with the Islamo-Fascists then how did she get inside information so as to be involved and gain ‘experience?’ She did not have a top secret security clearance. Did she break the laws[again]? Where did she get her military experience? From reading the New York Times—aka—The Walter Duranty Papers?[10]
Quoth Old Red Lady:
“Hillary’s boys pout that the press should find some dirt on Obama before time runs out.”[11]
We thought Bill already had prepared this. The only thing that prevents Billy Clinton from an outright racial attack on Senator Obama is that this might appear to be an outright racial attack in the eyes of minorities. They might sit this one out. The signal here is for somebody to tear down Obama’s image in some manner that cannot be traced back to Billary and Company. Such a task is delegated to the ragzines such as the NYT!
Perhaps, the Old Red Lady[12] missed her chance at this:
Quoth the Queen:
Mirror, mirror upon the wall,
Who is the fairest fair of all?[13]
Quoth the Mirror:
Thou, O Hillary, art the fairest of all,
[Aside in a stage whisper: Until Super Tuesday O Queen!]
[Months later an after being prodded by the NYT:]
Quoth the Queen:
Mirror, mirror upon the wall,
Who is the fairest fair of all?[14]
Quoth the Mirror:
O Lady Hillary, though fair ye be,
O’Bama is fairer far to see.
[Aside: “… and will be thus even fairer after Texas!”]
[Poor little Hillary [playing several parts in this tale with ease] was now all alone in the wild primary race, and so frightened was she that she trembled at every superdelegate vote that rustled and thought to flee.] [15]
[Then, after a shouting match with the King she stormed back to the lying mirror and repeated her threat:]
Demanded the Queen:
Mirror, mirror upon the wall
Why the Hell am I not the fairest??!!
[Ignoring the implied response and in a Satanic Frenzy she retorted:]
Quoth the Queen:
I will have you broken up into little pieces and
Scattered on the top of the landfill on Staten Island!!
[Nonplussed by this effrontery,]
Quoth the Mirror:
O Lady Queen, though fair ye be,
O’Bama is fairer far to see.
Over the hills and far away,
He dwells with seven liberal dwarfs
And the majority of delegates as well."
[Stage direction: Then as the playwright[16] jumbles both metaphors and some fairy tales:]
Quoth the Queen:
Then off with the bugger’s head!!
And the media set off on the quest for political dirt
and to grind their axes and prepare for war.
The end [of Hillary].
rycK
[2] Or how we should all learn to love the bomb.
[5] A Wake-Up Call for Ibid.
[6] A Wake-Up Call for Ibid.
[7] No offense to David Brooks, who also writes about politics for the NYT.
[8] Harry Potter almost lost it in the episode.
[9] A Wake-Up Call for Ibid.
[10] Red in honor of Stalin. Walter Duranty. “ He said that these people had to be "liquidated or melted in the hot fire of exile and labor into the proletarian mass". Duranty claimed that the Siberian labor camps were a means of giving individuals a chance to rejoin Soviet society but also said that for those who could not accept the system, "the final fate of such enemies is death.". Duranty, though describing the system as cruel, says he has "no brief for or against it, nor any purpose save to try to tell the truth". He ends the article with the claim that the brutal collectivization campaign which led to the famine was motivated by the "hope or promise of a subsequent raising up" of Asian-minded masses in the Soviet Union which only history could judge.” http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Walter_Duranty
[11] A Wake-Up Call for Ibid.
[13] http://www.scils.rutgers.edu/~kvander/snowwhitetext.html
[14] http://www.scils.rutgers.edu/~kvander/snowwhitetext.html